I’ve had a lot of time for reflection over these past few months. I wanted to share everything I learned from planning and experiencing an extensive backpacking trip; like how to save, where to go, what you’ll need, and also what I learned while on the trip itself (a lot). But I found myself asking- what is it that I have to offer that isn’t already out there? There are thousands of travel blogs written by people like me. People who have made it possible to leave their job, travel the world, and find whatever it was they were looking for. It’s been done. So what can I tell you that you haven’t already heard?
Hence, I went back and forth shutting myself down on this pursuit. I wasn’t good enough or insightful enough. Writing/blogging isn’t a realistic way of making a living (probably isn’t) and “what if no one reads it?” (it’s okay if no one does). So every so often, I’d save clips of my writings in a secret folder on my laptop and would then close it shut, defeated.
But who was telling me I wasn’t good enough or that I had nothing to offer? Who was telling me “no?” It was the Internet full of other blogs! Wrong. It was society! Wrong again.
It was me, and only me.
Then I realized that I’ve been doing this to myself for longer than just the past few months, and I know for certain that I am not the only person who is experiencing or has experienced this. So if you find yourself still reading, please let this sink in:
The only voice telling you “no” is the voice inside your head, but the other side to this beautiful and ugly truth is that the only voice that can tell you “yes” is also inside your head.
What do I mean by that? I mean that up until recently I worked under the belief that the main thing you needed to take a trip was time and/or money. And I was going to provide all the resources to you on how to accumulate those things. However, you also need something that is much less tangible before you even buy your first plane ticket or put in your two weeks notice; you need permission. Permission from yourself, permission to prioritize your desires above what is normal and logical. You need to allow yourself to make choices you never have before and believe with all of your heart that they are right for you. You must accept your freedom to go down different paths, even if that means going backwards. You need this more than any amount of time or money there is.
Once I figured this out, something clicked. That is what kept me from doing many of the things I’ve wanted to do in my life. Permission. When I felt stuck, I didn’t give myself a way out. I told myself “no,” and let myself believe that it was society and other factors that were behind it. I let myself close my laptop shut. I let myself believe that what I really wanted wasn’t possible, and that at this point, it would be too hard to start over. I didn’t give myself permission to find my purpose, to try new things, to hold my own time as more valuable than others’, and to pursue the one thing I’ve always known I wanted to do.
So where do we go from here? How do we overpower our own mind? How do we get ourselves out of the “no” silo we’ve created and into the “yes?”
By doing. It might sound cliché but do the thing(s) that scares you. Do the thing you’ve been telling yourself you couldn’t do. Give yourself permission to do so and then give it everything. Because once you get past your nonexistent “no,” you can get moving on to your “Yes -I can,” “Yes- I will,” and ultimately your “Yes- I did.”
Welcome to The Realist and The Daydreamer, and welcome to my attempt and work in progress at all of the above.